Liza Rivas

I have discussed this topic with many parents of preschoolers.  Not an easy topic for many and definitely arises anxiety and worries.

It is true that children repeat patterns or situations, but masturbating, touching, rocking is not necessarily a sign of abuse.  Many children discover their bodies at a young age.  Socially they still do not understand or perceive that it is incorrect to express emotions or sensations in front of others in that way.

So what to do?  First you must take the child to the pediatrician.  You need to rule out infections, rashes or other physiological conditions.

Second, after ruling out a physical situation then you need to observe when this is taking place and simply distract your child by asking him or her to get something or to play with a toy.  Get your child busy and keep their hands occupied.

At school teachers may do the same thing.  If it is too constant or evident the teacher may ask the child to go to the bathroom and remind him or her that some things are private.

Some parents feel the need to talk to their child.  I have talked to parents that their child has simply said, “Mom it feels good to touch that part.”  Though it sounds shocking for a mother or a father, your child is being honest.  There is no need to reprimand him or her.  My experience is that as they get older they stop doing it publicly.

Do not assume the worst when you are told that your child is touching his or her private parts, just follow the suggestions above and take time to observe and talk to your child.  Children tend to be open and honest about their feelings; try your best to be comfortable talking to them.